Five Women, Four Mule Deer, and a Dog Named Butch

Photo credit: Lindsey Mulcare

We parked the truck and filed out into the wet, cool air. We had to make sure that we knew exactly where we were and what direction we could go, in order to stay within the property boundaries and stay in areas open to hunting, within the property. After checking the wind and chatting a little, we chose to all head off to the southwest, to see if we couldn't stumble upon some Mule Deer. I had never hunted with this many people before, so it felt a little strange and not entirely real stealthy. But for whatever reason, I didn't really mind. I was hunting with four women, a young lady, and a dog, whom I may never have the opportunity to hunt with as a group again, so I was totally just going with it. But to just say I was hunting with them, and then not tell you how amazing they all are, would do them a serious injustice. So, I'll give you a little insight, just a tiny fraction of the attributes that make these women who they are, and you'll understand why this very unplanned, and unexpected group hunt, meant so very much to me.

Sarah K.
Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

Sarah is someone whom I look up to immensely. She is someone who has known hunting her entire life, literally moved away from it, but found herself wanting to get back to her roots and ended up coming back to be an active participant, in her twenties. She is a confident, strong outdoorswoman, who isn't afraid to go out and hunt solo, but she is also patient enough to offer a new hunter valuable guidance. She lights up a room with her amazing sense of self, and she makes me insanely proud to just be exactly who I am, without reservation. She is someone who makes everyone else better. Sarah is also a freelance writer, covering numerous topics, including the hunting culture and the outdoors, and she is very good at it.

Lindsey and Anna

 Lindsey has an incredible family history when it comes to hunting and conservation. Her Grandmother was an avid hunter and staunch supporter of conservation, passing that on to Lindsey's father, who then passed it on to Lindsey at an early age. She had to put hunting on the back burner for a while, but has returned as an adult, and done so, keeping the family history close to her heart. She was wearing her grandmother's wool coat and carrying her Grandmother's rifle while taking her first elk, so it's no surprise that she is now passing her hunting heritage on to her daughter, Anna. And she is doing a bang-up job of it! Lindsey is also an amazing photographer, who graciously lent her talent to this entire experience, capturing special memories for all us, over the course of those five days in Eastern Montana. To say I am grateful for those photos, her talent, and her friendship, is a massive understatement.

Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

Anna is an amazing young lady who came to Deer Camp last year with her mom (Lindsey), with no real desire to become a hunter, but after leaving the Crazy Mountains last November, she asked her mom if she could take Hunter Education. She did, and this time around, she was experiencing her first hunt. I couldn't have been more excited for her, or proud to be hunting with Anna, and watching her soak it all in. This young lady is going to do big things, and I have no doubt, going to be an excellent outdoorswoman as she continues to learn and spend time in the field. And a huge shutout to her, for jumping right in to help when things got gritty, with zero apprehension, but I'll get to that here shortly.

Nicole is the reason we were all there in the first place, this idea of Deer Camp is hers, and we are all grateful. She is someone who picked up hunting as an adult to feel that connection with the animals that she often found herself surrounded by, while out hiking or camping. She, as a newer hunter and much like the rest of us, is learning every time she goes out, but she has an amazing way of sharing those experiences with others through her writing, and her ability to tell a story. She isn't bashful when it comes to talking about emotions and what it means to take the life of an animal. We need that voice, we need that honesty, we cry, we celebrate, we feel remorse, but we also feel an immense amount of respect for the animals we kill. She offers a woman's perspective, but it's a perspective that is not felt solely by women, I believe all hunters have these emotions, but she has a way of reminding everyone that there is nothing wrong with expressing them and doing so openly. Nicole is special and I am proud to call her my friend.

Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

And I would be remiss if I didn't mention Nicole's best boy, "Butch", the only dog I love as much as my own. Butch and I bonded last year at Deer Camp. It sounds absurd, but he calmed the fears and anxieties I had about camping in the mountains, thousands of miles from home, with complete strangers. I knew if I felt freaked out, I just needed to find Butch, and I would be fine. Dogs, they really are something, and this guy is something special. Butch rounded out the crew that day, a crew I couldn't be more excited about hunting with, but also a group I was confident hunting alongside, for my last full day in Eastern Montana.

We didn't necessarily have any sort of plan, we just started walking and glassing from time to time, as we continued to hike further from the truck. After hiking for about forty-five minutes, we decided to climb up a ridge to glass for a minute before heading off in a different direction. Not long after I got sat down, Sarah said she had four does in sight, about three ridges over. We all got eyes on them and watched for a few minutes to see which direction they were feeding. I was sitting on the hillside, smiling ear to ear, my heart starting to race, and I looked back at Sarah and said, "What do you think"? And without hesitation she said, "Hell yeah, let's go for it"! We immediately started descending that steep, rocky hillside that just moments ago I had been sitting on, enjoying the relief of not having my pack on my back or my rifle on my shoulder. As we dropped down, we needed to move swiftly through the wet grass and the marshy area below us because we no longer had eyes on those does and it would be very easy to lose them completely by the time we reached higher ground.

The moment Sarah and I decided to go after the does. Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

After hightailing it about three hundred yards, we climbed up a small crest, and just as we reached the top of it, I quickly stopped and told Sarah to "get down". There was a decent buck across the way, on a small hillside. I knew that she had an either sex tag, so I wanted her to get eyes on this deer. We had dropped just behind the hillside and after taking our packs off, we crawled back up to find that buck again through our binos. Sarah got eyes on him and ranged the distance, it was something like 268 yards, "I'm totally comfortable with that distance" she said, now looking through her binos again. I suggested that she get set up and take the shot. She had apprehension though, she knew that if she took a shot at that buck, my chance at one of those does was gone. "Cindy, what about your doe, we all want you to get a deer so badly"? I looked at her and told her that I wasn't concerned about those does, there was a buck standing less than three hundred yards in front of us, and it would be ridiculous for her to pass that up. About the time she conceded and started to get set up on the buck, he laid down, facing away from us. She didn't have a clear shot. Sarah said she could be patient and wait him out if that was good with me, which it was. But right after he laid down, there was another development, Sarah spotted three does laying there in plain sight, right next to him. This threw a wrench in our plan.

After laying on our stomachs for a few minutes, watching these four bedded Mule Deer, Sarah asked me if I thought I could get to the next small hill, closer to the Muleys, without getting busted. I honestly didn't think I could get in that specific spot without being seen, but there was a much higher ridge a little bit further away and more to the left, that I felt was a better option, if I was going to put a stalk on these deer. She asked me if I was sure, and I said "No, but what the hell, I might as well try". We came up with a plan where she would stay on the buck while I was making my move. If he got up or moved, she was free to take the shot, if he didn't, and I could get into position to take a shot at one of the does, she would immediately follow with a second shot on the buck. Neither of us had ever tried to double on deer, or have ever been in this situation, so we really didn't know if it was even a good idea, but we went with it anyway, because like I said "what the hell"?

Sarah lining up on the
buck before he bedded.

I scooted back down the hill in the direction we had come from initially, put my pack back on and grabbed my rifle. I had to get around the bottom of the hill we were on and across a flat, wet, grassy area in order to sneak up the ridge that would get me closer to those does. Off I went. I was excited and I started to almost jog, but I remembered that if I got myself in a good position, I was going to have to shoot fairly quickly, and gasping for air once I got my rifle up, was going to make a steady shot much more difficult. So, I slowed my pace a little and started to think through what I needed to do as I approached the ridge. I kept looking back at Sarah to make sure I was never between her and the bedded Mule Deer, and I wasn't. I was angled off to her left, in a safe area where it wouldn't interfere with a shot if she needed to take it. Lindsey, Nicole and Anna had moved off in the opposite direction, and stayed up high on a ridgeline, my eye caught their blaze orange just before I started to creep up the hill in front of me. Now I needed to focus on getting to the deer and not getting busted, my biggest fear was ruining this for Sarah.

I stopped just before I started my climb. I dropped my pack, I took off my bino harness, but took the binos and started up the hill. Once I was about halfway up, I got down on my knees and started to crawl. I got a little closer, so I chambered a round. I still couldn't see over the ridge, so I had no real idea where I was, in comparison to the four bedded deer, but I knew I was getting closer to finding out. I got on my stomach and started to belly crawl. I didn't want to pop over the top of this ridge and immediately spook these deer by getting skylined. Right before I got to the top, I looked back at Sarah one last time, she still had her eye to her scope, still in the same direction. I looked over at the rest of our crew, they were far out of harm's way if I or Sarah were to fire off a shot. I took a breath and eased my head up over the top of the ridge, and there they were. I was shocked, as they were literally right in front of me, still bedded.

I panicked for a split second because it dawned on me that I would have to shoot in the prone position, something I have only done once or twice at a target, and I hated it. I didn't have my bi-pod on my gun due to how heavy it was and how much it bothered my shoulder to carry the added weight, and it wouldn't have worked in that instance anyway. The deer were slightly downhill from me so this prone thing might work out after all. Without hesitating, I flipped my binos over and made a "cradle" or "rest" to set my rifle in and found the doe in my sights. I then found the buck who was bedded ever so slightly down, and to the left, from where she was. There were two other does but I didn't even take the time to find them, they were on the opposite side of the buck from where this one was, and they were laying one right in front of the other, not a shot I could take, for fear of hitting them both. I quickly moved my scope back to the doe I was targeting, slid the safety off, and for some reason started to squeeze the trigger two different times but didn't. I took my breath, I put my finger on the trigger, and I removed it both times. I can't explain it, but I had this horrible fear of missing. I was afraid of missing in front of my friends, I was afraid of failing, after all of this work, after driving over a thousand miles to hunt, after hiking ten to twelve miles a day the few days prior to this, I was afraid of being embarrassed.

Binos for a rest and shooting prone, both new ones for me.
The red highlighted spot in the distance is where the doe was bedded.

But I suddenly didn't have a choice, if I was going to attempt to shoot this doe, I had to do it right now. I had to do it now, because the buck had just stood up, and he looked like he was getting ready to bolt. I quickly found my doe in my sights and this time, without hesitation, I took a deep breath and I squeezed that trigger. I kept my eye in the scope, something that I have a bad habit of not doing, and her head dropped the instant I heard the rifle go off. It was that quick, she didn't get up and run, she didn't flail, she didn't suffer, she didn't move a muscle, it was over just that quick. Just as fast as I heard my own rifle, I heard a shot come from off to my right, Sarah had fired on that buck immediately after I had fired at the doe. I stayed in my position for a moment, not knowing if Sarah had hit the buck or not. She fired again, but I couldn't see the other deer anymore, so I didn't know what was happening. Once I saw her come off her rifle, I was able to breathe again. I sat up and, in that instant, the emotion hit me. I started to cry, but it was more of a huge sigh of relief, mixed with exhaustion, mixed with elation. But there were a few tears shed before I left that spot on that ridge. I went down the hill to grab my pack and other belongings, but for some reason left my rifle up top, so I had to go back up after it, this time, I WAS jogging, actually, it felt like I was floating. When I got to my rifle, I ranged the deer where she lay, 112 yards, I was a little surprised I was that close, but thankful for sure, that it all worked out.

Once at the bottom where I met back up with Sarah, I saw her act like she was jokingly throwing her hat down and she said something along the lines of "Well, crap"! I asked her if she hit the buck because after I shot the doe, I lost track of the other deer. She was like "No, I missed because I punched the trigger.... Wait, what? Did you shoot that doe"? I told her I did, and she almost let out a holler and started laughing and said "Oh, well I don't even care about missing the buck, I didn't know you got the doe"! She was genuinely happy for me, and that takes quite a person to be that way after things on her end not working out. This is why I love this woman, she's amazing. And so is Nicole, and Lindsey and Anna. They were all so happy and excited for me when they learned that I had taken the doe. Huge hugs and a lot of smiles were present when we all met back up. We walked up toward the hillside that the doe was laying on, and like always, I felt a little bit of panic set in when I didn't find her right away, I mean, I knew she was there, but still, I was anxious. Then Lindsey yelled out "Here she is"! I climbed higher on the hillside and saw the brown hair laying beneath a clump of sagebrush. She was beautiful.

The moment we met back up with Lindsey, Nicole and Anna, after I shot my doe.
Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare.

After looking her over, thanking her for her life and all of the meals she would provide in the coming months, and getting some pictures, I mentioned to Nicole that I felt weird about shooting a bedded deer. I had never done that before, and to be honest, the previous October in Wyoming, I had spent almost two hours crawling toward a bedded Mule Deer buck, while waiting for him to stand up before I shot him. I told myself I wouldn't shoot a bedded animal, and I'm not sure what changed between then and now, but something did. I think hearing the rationale from people I trust, from a hunting ethics standpoint, and look up to, like Randy Newberg and Steve Rinella, has made me less judgmental about that set of circumstances and what is acceptable. Not everyone will agree with what I did, and some days I still question my actions, but at the end of the day, I didn't do anything wrong. That doe was awake and as alert as she would have been if she had been on her feet, it is no different.

Now it was time to work. I have never broken an animal down in the field, so I relied heavy on the guidance of these amazing women who had, and they helped me every step of the way. There were four of us in there skinning and quartering, which could make a person nervous with that many knives going in that many different directions, but I was loving every second of the process. This was a team effort and my heart was bursting at the seams watching each person doing their part. Especially Anna. She asked for gloves, she was wielding a knife, she was full of questions and she had zero apprehension about jumping right in to help. She hadn't done this before, but she was amazing. She helped skin, quarter, remove the backstraps, help me gut the deer and go in for the inner loins. Blood on her pants, her jacket, she didn't care, she was all in. That made me proud, I can only imagine how proud Lindsey was, watching it all in real time.

Look closely, that smile never left my face. I love this picture so much.
Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

Anna was a rockstar! Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

We all took some meat, put it in our packs, celebrated one last time with a big high five, and started our hike back to the truck. A heavy pack felt amazing, it was all I hoped it would be, but with two defunct shoulders, I was so happy that we were sharing the load that afternoon. I realized after walking about two or three hundred yards that I had lost my phone. For real, lost. I went from the highest of highs to instant panic. I know no one's phone number. not even Chance's, I need my phone to get home, because Lord knows I don't own a map, and all my pictures from this trip and my Wyoming trip from the month before, were on that phone. Holy shit, I need my phone. Lindsey and I backtracked to see if we could find it while everyone else headed for the truck. Thankfully Lindsey had turned on the "Tracker" option on her OnX Hunt app on her phone, so we knew the exact path we had taken. Long story short, we looked, we couldn't find it, we looked some more, and finally I said "Forget it, we need to get out of here before it starts to rain harder, and it's just a damn phone". We started to walk back, yet again, in the direction we had come from, and low and behold, I glanced over and saw it out of the corner of my eye. Just dumb luck if you ask me. We laughed, I thanked her for helping me look and we made our move back toward the truck, which was another mile or mile-and-a half away.

Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare

We got to the truck, loaded up, and slipped and slid our way out of that amazing property before the roads turned to complete gumbo. I sat in the backseat of Nicole's truck, exhausted, with Butch snuggled in on my lap and the biggest smile on my face that you could imagine. I didn't even care that I still had a flat tire to deal with on my truck. That could wait until tomorrow. Once we got back to camp and got the meat into a cooler that I would leave cracked open in the bed of my truck over night to cool, it was time to relax. Nicole asked if we could cook up the inner loins for everyone to have a bite of as a ceremonial celebration, I didn't hesitate in saying yes. She laid out some tin foil on top of the wood burning stove, melted a little butter, set the meat on there and added a few herbs and let it cook. It came off the stove, she sliced it on the top of a cooler and everyone took a piece or two. Maybe it was the moment, maybe it was my pride, or maybe I was just so damn hungry, but I thought that Mule Deer inner loin, cooked in the simplest way possible, was the best I had ever eaten.

People were leaving during the course of the day on Sunday, I missed a few goodbyes, and I had hoped for more pictures of the entire group, but people had lives to get back to, jobs to show up for, and families waiting at home. And so, did I. On Monday morning, I woke up early, got dressed and went out to change my tire. I needed to put the spare on so I could limp into town and hopefully get my tire fixed. I did all the above, and fifteen dollars later, I was heading back to camp to pack up.

Once everything was packed into my truck, I hung around for a bit hoping Nicole, Lindsey, Anna and Sarah would get back so I could say goodbye in person. I chatted with Courtney about her hunt the day before and we talked about the struggles we had both had, but we also talked about how we both needed to be more confident in ourselves and to put the 'fear of missing' out of our minds, because no one is perfect and people miss all of the time. We can't miss out on opportunities just because we are afraid of missing the animal. One of the Game Wardens from Saturday night showed up again, asking if we needed to send any sample with him for CWD testing and I said "Yes, please"! He took my doe's head and filled out a form with my information and where I had killed her. He gave me a card with a reference number to check online in a few weeks to get my results. Which I did (thankfully, my doe did not test positive).

I couldn't wait any longer, so I said my goodbyes to the girls who were at camp and just then, Sarah pulled into the parking lot. And I was elated to find out she had a doe in the back of her truck! This made my day. This somehow made me feel better, even relief, because I felt terrible that she didn't get the buck the day before. Now she was taking meat back to Bozeman and I couldn't have been happier for her. Lindsey, Nicole and Anna were still out, but I had a long drive ahead of me and I couldn't wait for them to return to camp. So just like that, I was headed home. 

The Badlands National Park was amazing. This guy was my favorite.

It was a long trip home, one with an amazing stop in the Badlands National Park, in South Dakota, where I saw the one animal I hoped to see there, a Bighorn Sheep. And to make it even better, I saw five of them, two up close. I saw a herd of Bison, which were beautiful and enormous, I saw a Coyote and some Mule Deer. And those views, I just couldn't believe the views. It was well worth the added two hours to my drive. But I'm not going to lie, once I got into Indiana, the home stretch, I was hanging on by a thread. It was a rough last few hours of driving for sure. I made it home Wednesday morning about 2 am. I woke at 5 am and went to work. By 7 am, I was missing all the women I had spent the last five days with, camping and hunting in eastern Montana. As of today, it's been 58 days since I left Montana and Deer Camp, and guess what, I still miss every one of those women, especially the four that helped carry the weight on that special Sunday afternoon that I'll never forget. And Butch, I miss Butch too.

Photo Credit: Lindsey Mulcare